


PS I love you

by emotionalsupporthufflepuff



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Flashbacks, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Memory Loss, New York City, Romantic Comedy, Yes I saw the movie, beatles songs, but NO ONE DIES IN THIS ONE, just trust me, no one dies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:28:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26754325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emotionalsupporthufflepuff/pseuds/emotionalsupporthufflepuff
Summary: After a tragic accident, Hermione must reintroduce Draco to a life they've built far away from home. She recieves unexpected help in a series of letter written by Draco himself before the accident...
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy
Comments: 93
Kudos: 203
Collections: Dramione RomCom Fest





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [DramioneRomComFest](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/DramioneRomComFest) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
> P.S. I Love You (2007) - claimed by emotionalsupporthufflepuff
> 
> So do I just leave that? I'm leaving it...  
> HELLO FRIENDS. In case you didn't see it in the tags - No. One. Dies. I couldn't do that to them, I didn't have the heart ( And it's a Dramione fest so like...) So I just made my own twist! with magic!  
> AND I added Beatles songs into which the original was lacking. You are welcome!  
> Big thanks to the creators and hosts of this fest! It's been an awesome time getting to know you all!  
> BIG love to my alphabetaenabler TalonWillow.

"So, are we going to talk about how you just told my mother we aren't going to have children? Or are we pretending that didn't happen?" Draco's irritated voice came in close to her ear. Hermione bought herself a few paces to get ahead of him by sliding between two people, which was rude ,but she was desperate. 

" _ No, " _ she answered, pulling out the key to the door that led to the corridor where there was a wall of muggle post boxes and the stairs leading to their walk-up. She tried to slam it shut behind her, but Draco had already caught up. 

"No, what? To which part Hermione, because I clearly wasn't a part of the first conversation in which we made this decision - stop trying to run away from me." Hermione was now at a full jog up the stairs, silently cursing MACUSA's strict statute of secrecy laws, prohibiting them from apparating into their own apartment. 

"No, we aren’t talking about it right now." Finally, the front door was in sight and risking the citation, she opened it with a burst of wandless magic and ran to get inside. 

It was no use. Draco was still right behind her with hardly any effort. 

"So you're just going to make that decision for us, drop the bomb on my mother and not talk about it. Do not go in..." the door to the bathroom slammed shut. 

Draco pulled out his tie from his collar and shrugged off the Oxford entirely, standing in the apartment's tiny sitting room, ready for round two. 

"We have to talk about it…" 

Sure enough, the frizzy-haired witch came storming out of the bathroom in her pinkest frumpiest pajamas. "What I said was, 'it's not in the cards for us right now.' It's not;’ there's no space for a baby in here.’ " She stomped around, pointing her wand at various messes around the house. "To afford a bigger place, we'd need better jobs; to get better jobs, we would have to save money." Hermione stopped in the kitchen in front of the stove, hand resting on the kettle. "Guess what we currently aren't doing.." 

Draco toed off his shoes and flipped them towards the wall with his foot, listening as they thumped unceremoniously against the floor. "Saving money." 

"Correct Mr. Malfoy. 10 points to Slytherin." She lit the stove with her wand, waiting for the water to boil. 

"So, if say , hypothetically, we moved back to England-" 

Hermione's hair grew with the flair of magic in her. "We aren't moving back to England. The reasons we moved here are still valid. We've built a life here, our friends have to come to be a part of it. In England, you'd hardly be able to work, and we'd never be able to be together without the constant harassment and  _ the death threats _ . Do you remember the death threats? At least here we're alive and safe and we can walk down the  _ fucking  _ street." 

"What if I took out a loan from my father. Just to get the down payment on a better place? What would the cards say then?" 

The kettle started to screech, and so did Hermione. "Your father cut you off when we moved because his love is highly conditional and I won’t stand for it ! You live in England in the Manor. You don't work, you manage ' the family affairs.' I can stay as long as I don’t work, produce an heir, and "help rebuild the family name." That's not  _ love,  _ Draco, that's emotional manipulation, and I don’t want a baby at the expense of your further exploitation!" She relieved the kettle of its whistle, moving it to another burner. 

With a heavy sigh, Draco turned around and let himself fall on the couch, sprawled out. Reaching behind him, he pulled a black acoustic guitar into his lap. After a minute of tuning, he started to play a sad, low chord. 

_ Yesterday  _

_ All my troubles seemed so far away.  _

He looked up in time to see a floating teacup on a saucer land on the table in front of him though Hermione had not left the kitchen. 

_ Now it looks as though there here to stay. _

_ Oh, I believe in yesterday.  _

Hermione stormed out of the kitchen and into their single tiny bedroom, slamming the door behind her. 

_ Why she had to go, I don't know. _

_ She wouldn’t say _

_ I said something wrong, now I long for -  _

Draco stopped playing, put the guitar down at his side, took a sip of tea, and waited. 

The bedroom door cracked open. 

"You can't leave the song like that-"

"Why can't I?" 

"Finish the Song-" 

"Does it bother you that I won't ?" 

" _ Draco."  _

"I know, I'll start another song instead…" 

" _ Merlin's pants." _

He started a familiar riff that sounded morose without its accompanying parts. 

_ I give her all my love.  _

_ That's all I do _

_ And if you saw my love.  _

_ You'd love her too.  _

The door snapped shut again, but Draco pressed on. 

_ She gives me everything.  _

_ And tenderly  _

_ The kiss my lover brings  _

_ She brings to me.  _

He stopped again and waited. The door burst open, and Hermione came back out, tea in hand, and sat on the opposite end of the couch, still not looking at him. 

"Well…" she snapped, propping her feet up on the coffee table. 

_ And I love her.  _

“Bald-faced lies Malfoy.” 

“Do you want me to finish the song or not?” 

Hermione looked over at him finally, her icy facade fading. “No. Yes. I don’t know. I want things to be  _ better, _ Draco. Isn’t that why we came here? For better lives?”

Carefully leaning the guitar on the arm of the sofa. Draco slid over to her, wrapping his arms around his wife, pulling her legs across his. “Anywhere I’m with you is a better life, Hermione.” Carding his fingers in her curls, he tilted her chin up for a slow kiss, full of unspoken promise. She broke away and stared up into his eyes. 

“My mother said we shouldn’t get married. She said I loved you too much. It’s still true. I do love you too much. “ 

***

Draco straightened the silverware on the table again, went to touch the flowers in the middle, and stopped himself, stuffing his hands in his pockets again. Dinner sat on the stove, waiting to be served. The apartment was clean and had the long-neglected pictures of their wedding and life in New York, framed and hanging on the wall. 

All he had to do now was wait.

His heart jumped as the front door opened with the customary creak of the hinges. 

Hermione’s hair was at full volume, and as was carrying herself as if she could fall over and go straight to sleep. Her robes were askew, and it even looked as if one of the sleeves was burnt half off. 

But then she smiled at him, and none of it mattered. 

“Sorry I’m late, a Demiguise got loose and wandered into the archives. Took forever to convince it to come out. Dinner smells amazing ...and you cleaned! Oh...thank you.” Draco had come up behind her to take her outer robe and hang it up. “Happy anniversary. “

“Happy anniversary, love. Sit down, I have something to tell you.” His hands traced the outline of her hips for a moment before letting go. 

“You did it, you made the potion....” She guessed, mouth falling open and amber eyes lighting up with excitement. 

“I will tell you over dinner, go sit- “

“You did, didn’t you?! Draco!” With a jump, she wrapped her arms around his neck and legs around his hips, their mouth colliding in a frenzied passion. 

“I was going to serve you dinner and plow you with wine.” Another kiss and a laugh from her as she continued to hold on to him, though he was supporting most of her weight in his arms. “Then we were going to have hot, nasty anniversary sex,  _ then _ I was going to tell you.” 

“You can tell me again during dinner and after sex. I’m so proud of you. So so so proud. You’re going to help so many people.” she held a hand on either side of his face. “I’m going to sit down, and you can tell me the whole thing just like you wanted to.” Sliding down, she half-ran to her seat at the table. 

Draco summoned the food and wine to the table. “Hello, my love, how was your day at work?” 

“Completely uneventful, I have nothing to report.” 

“Nothing?”

“Nothing.” 

Draco hummed. “Well, I have something to report.”

Hermione took a sip of wine and pretended to look shocked. “What’s that dearest husband?”

It sounded surreal even as he spoke the words out loud. “The trials of my potion came back with excellent reviews. My memory potion is proven to effectively reduce trauma-induced flashbacks by 75 percent overall and a 50 percent reduction in intensity and vibrancy. Repressing them all the way was proven inadvisable, but this…” he took his own sip of wine. “Will make the healing process much more manageable as the victim begins to cope with the aid of a mind healer, of course.”

Hermione’s eyes were shining. “Happy Anniversary, Draco. This year is going to be so much better.”

***

She had cried so much over the last two days, squeezing out more tears over her red puffy eyes stung, but it would not seem to stop no matter how she willed it. 

“He’s lucky to be alive.” The healer mumbled the empty platitude again. Hermione ignored him and stroked the piece of pale blond hair from her husband’s face. “I’ll leave you too it then.”

Only after the heavy hospital room door had clicked shut did she dare to speak to the comatose wizard under her fingers. Tracing a fresh jagged scar along the corner of his right eye. “I like your new scar. Harry’s going to be so jealous he doesn’t have the market on interesting scars anymore.” She sniffled and sucked in a ragged breath. “You going to have to brag about it yourself, you know… “

The stillness in the room, the overwhelming void of quiet in the heart of such a noisy place, was unnerving. 

“Come back to me. I love you too much.” Though she knew she’d be scolded for it later, very carefully Hermione curled up on the edge of the bed, face to face, and started to hum the first song that came to mind.

_ A love like ours _

_ Could never die _

_ As long as I  _

_ Have you near me.  _


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco wakes up and Hermione starts to explain how they came to be

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you no one died...

A week after Draco's accident, Hermione was back at the hospital for her daily visit. 

Today was the day he was going to wake up, and everything would go back to normal. She knew it. She could feel it in her soul. 

To keep herself busy, she read the print out of the stats at the end of his bed and thoroughly bombarded every nurse and Healer who came into the room with questions about it.He was relatively healthy except for not being awake which was perplexing. When they started to avoid her, she fussed over his bedsheets and pillows. 

"You are going to hate these things," Hermione mumbled, manually trying to squash the pillow into a more full state. "Probably going to demand to go home just to not have to sleep on them another night." They flattened again, and she huffed, leaning over Draco's face to force them upright.

She heard an intake of air from somewhere in the room and froze. 

Looking down, she saw grey eyes blinking awake, looking puzzled then glancing upward. 

"Granger?"

"You're awake… oh my God…"

"But-" 

Hermione squealed with joy and bolted to the door, shouting down the hall. Then dashing back to the bed, she cradled his face in her hands, crying and sobbing, "You're awake. You came back to me. I thought I lost you. I was so scared." 

"Granger -" 

"Everything is ok. You're awake. So scared." She leaned in to kiss him, but he pulled away sharply and wrapped his hand around her wrist. 

"Granger, why are you here? What happened and- " he looked around the room, eyes widening nervously, falling on the hospital crest on the wall. "This isn't St. Mungos." 

"No...why would I take you back to England when we live in New York?" 

" _ We  _ live  _ where?"  _

At that moment, a team of Healers came rushing in, crowding Hermione out of the way to ask questions and run diagnostics. She used the cover of the chaos to step out into the hall and collapse into a bench against the far wall. 

Her entire being felt shocked to her very core. This whole time she has been worried about losing him physically; the possibility that anything could happen to him mentally had escaped her notice. She racked her own memories for the easiest explanation of how they came about, but nothing about it seemed simple…

_ How do I sum up what feels like a lifetime together? _

It felt like hours later before she heard someone talking to her...

"Mrs. Malfoy, your husband is ready for you to come back, and there's an Auror investigating the accident site who has some questions as well. We’ve answered his questions to the best of our abilities. " 

Hermione didn't bother to look the Healer in the eye, not wanting to see the pity there, instead nodded and went back to the room. 

Draco was sitting up, pale eyes watching her, but his hands gave him away. He spun his wedding on his finger over and over, showing his nerves. She reminded herself she’d feel very vulnerable if she’d woken up in a new country, even with someone who claimed to be her husband.

"Granger… or is it Hermione since we're married?" He asked, still watching her every movement as she sat in the chair next to his bed.

"We've been married for 5 years, and it's still Granger. Unless you're sick or you want something...or -" she had been about to say  _ in the bedroom  _ but remembered there was an Auror sitting outside and their conversation wasn't private. 

"Or?" He prompted, looking genuinely curious. 

"When we’re having... _ married people time _ ," she mumbled so only he could hear. 

A corner of his mouth turned up. "At least there's still that. But why the fuck am I in New York?" 

"Um...that's a little tricky. What's the last thing you remember? I’ll start from there." 

He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to remember. "Getting on the train at Hogsmeade Station after finishing school, after…" he swallowed hard. 

"That was when we decided to give this a real go...make it public. " she squeezed his hand.

He nodded. "But that doesn't feel like it should be the last thing, just don't know what is." 

Excitement surged through Hermione at this revelation. "Oh, that must be your own potion in your system! That means they aren't gone for good. Draco this is wonderful. The potion is only a suppressant; the memories will come back when it's out of your system." 

"How long will that take?" 

She bit her lip, trying to think if he'd ever told her. "I'm not sure…I never asked…" 

"Oh, brilliant." 

The Auror cleared his throat to interrupt them. He reported that the accident site had been investigated and found the cauldron had not been pure pewter as advertised, causing the potion to vaporize and explode. Other than the faulty cauldron, there was no foul play suspected. After a few questions about the day of the accident which only agitated Draco further, he left and let the Healer team come in. 

The Healers said other than his memory, Draco was healed and ready to return home. They had no answers except to "give it time." 

That was it. That same silence that had made her want to leave this place and never come back crept back in only this time it made her want to stay. 

Draco shifted uncomfortably on the bed. "Can you...I need to get dressed…" 

She blinked at him, not understanding for a moment. Then bit back a gasp. 

Right, all the time they spent getting to know each other, the quiet comfort of an established relationship, was gone.

For now. Gone for now. 

She pulled the folded clothes out of her bag, including a leather jacket that she stroked the collar of fondly. 

He gave an irritated huff. "What's this about?" 

"MACUSA is stingy with the apparition points, so we have kind of a long walk home. The wind here makes cloaks and traditional things highly impractical. You bought this," she tapped the jacket, "our first week here." A tear ran down her cheek. "I'll let you get changed." 

*** 

"This is it," Hermione announced, pushing the apartment door open. "Home sweet home." 

It was strange that so much had changed yet their little home had remained paused in time, right where they left off. Mugs of tea and coffee still sat cold on the counter. The bed was ruffled and unmade, with clothes still littered around it.

"This is  _ it?!  _ You're joking,Granger. There is no way I would voluntarily move into this -" 

"This is the place MACUSA allotted us when I took the job! If we want something else, we have to pay for it. All your money is still in England. Your father won't transfer it." She slid her bag down her arm and onto the table with a heavy sigh. Desperate to keep moving, she moved into the kitchen and started making tea.

"And why aren't we home? You keep avoiding that question!" His voice had the sharp edge of anger to it, almost accusatory. 

_ He's just scared and confused. You would be too.  _

"We couldn't be together there. Too many people wanted to see you in Azkaban or didn't want me muddling up such a pureblood line. We weren't safe…you stopped...getting better...you had these awful flashbacks." Finally, tearing her gaze away from the kettle. She met his eyes and saw that while he believed her, he was still struggling to fill in all the details with the information he didn't have. 

"So it's just us, here... in New York …" 

"At first, it was, yes. But Harry and Ginny and Pansy and Theo have made their way here. I suspect they'll be by tomorrow, though I've told them not too." Hermione kept her eyes firmly on the tea and not on Draco, who was pacing, running his hands through his hair. “They couldn’t stand it anymore either. Believe me, I didn’t want to have to leave.”

She wanted to wrap her arms around him. To press her head against his chest and listen to the steady rhythm of his heart and find her solace there. 

But this was a different version of Draco. This was the war-weary teen still trying to figure out who he was. She'd have to wait for her husband to come back, to be patient, and help him to remember. 

Sliding the tea in front of him, just as he liked it. She whispered, "You've had a long day, and you need rest. I'll take the couch for tonight." 

Anger still etched on his features, Draco took the mug and retreated into the bedroom, shutting the door with a hard force.

Bone tired and emotionally exhausted, Hermione fell asleep curled up on her couch, still dressed and alone. 

*** 

The next morning she woke up to her stomach rumbling. In all the excitement from yesterday, she'd forgotten to eat. 

The lightbulb clicked on in her mind. Phase one of getting Draco back would include a full English breakfast. 

But an hour later, with all the sausages burnt to a crisp and beans cemented to the bottom of the pan. Hermione was ready to crawl back into her bed and start the whole mission over again. 

Draco emerged from the bedroom looking bewildered at the sight of her, hair an absolute nightmare, make-up smudged around her cheeks as she tried to pry the stubborn beans from the pot. He was wearing nothing but black boxer shorts, and his hair was tousled from sleep. 

She sucked in a sharp breath to stop herself from saying what popped into her thoughts. Gripping the pot tightly, she tore her eyes away, resisting the urge to fling it away and jump his bones. 

"Morning, love. You might want to put pants on. Our visitors don't like to call and show up early- or knock for that matter, Theo especially-”

“At least that hasn’t changed.”

Breakfast will be ready… eventually…" 

Without another word, Draco went back into the bedroom and re-emerged in a forest green jumper and black jeans. 

"I take it you don't cook much…" 

"You usually do, actually. It took you a minute to master a lot of the muggle gadgets, but you figured it. Work keeps me late a lot, but I'm better at ordering take away. "Hermione put two pieces of bread in the toaster before starting a search for tomatoes, feeling lighter at having a task to accomplish instead of being alone with the overwhelming “what if’s”.

The sound of two familiar voices came drifting from the outside. “I hate stairs.”

“You went to school full of stairs for eight years, Theodore.”

“Which only intensified a natural dislike. This walk-up -”

“Stop whingeing! “ 

Draco threw open the front door, relieved that some things- like Pansy and Theo- never change.

“You’rer a fucking liar, Malfoy! There's no way you were in an accident -”

“Theo, don’t be thick; he has a scar!”

“Yeah, and apparently, I don’t remember the last 5 years. So there’s that.” 

The talking stopped as all the Slytherins came back into the apartment. “Fucking liar Malfoy…” Theo mumbled. He squeezed Hermione in a side hug. “Tell me he’s lying, Granger.” 

“I’m afraid not. “ 

Pansy was looking over Draco with pursed lips as if searching for something suspicious about him. “You're having us on.” 

Theo looked in the pot of beans that Hermione was still trying to salvage. “You’re a menace in the kitchen, Granger. Go on, get out. I’ll fix this nightmare.” 

“So, you don’t remember  _ anything _ since we left?“ Pansy took the tomatoes from Hermione. “You heard him, shoo, go save some underfed creature or something before you give us all food poisoning. “ 

“Nothing,” Draco responded simply. 

Theo waved the spatula he had commandeered. “How do you feel about pineapple on pizza?” 

Hermione groaned,“ Don’t start this again.”

Draco’s face contracted in confusion. “It doesn’t sound appetizing. “

Pansy whistled. “Wow. You really don’t remember…”

Theo had all four burners going, and delicious smells were filling the air. “Maybe this go around he’ll have better taste.” 

“He lost his memory, not had his taste buds reset! I don’t want to relive this argument anyway. Hawaiian pizza is fine, but not for everyone.” Hermione patted Draco’s hand. “You shouted that pineapple on pizza was proof that God abandoned us long ago and got us kicked out of a very posh restaurant.“

“Pineapple has no business being warmer than room temperature.” Came the familiar voice of Ginny Potter, holding open the door so Harry behind her could come in with an arm full of bakery boxes. 

“Oh no, this already?” Harry whined. “Is Malfoy going to get all monotheistic about pizza toppings again? I gotta say I agree mate but keep the rants to a minimum today? I’m hungover-” 

“Draco’s gone all Lockhart on us,” Pansy shouted from the kitchen. 

“I knew ‘Mione would try and cook so I brought real food!” Harry motioned to the boxes in his arms.

“Really? That looks like your real hair.” Ginny leaned over the seated blond, inspecting his hairline.

“No. I don’t remember the last 5 years, including when we got so comfortable Weasley- “ Draco turned his head, trying not to look down Ginny’s shirt. 

As the kitchen erupted into a fit of noise, Hermione caught sight of the post appearing on the table by the front door. New York City didn’t use owl posts as it was too inconspicuous for the climate and lack of trees but rather used charmed envelopes that appeared in the addressed home. 

The plain white envelope that appeared was addressed only to her, written in Draco’s writing. She turned it over, looking for another clue as to how it came about but found nothing. 

The letter inside read:

_ Hermione, _

_ I hope these letters never have to appear to you, though I do know the nature of working with memory potions. They can be extremely unpredictable in nature, so I want to be prepared just in case. _

_ Hopefully, since you are reading this, I’m still around and not a drooling empty shell of my handsome and charming self. Possibly it’s just a matter of time until all my memories of you are back.  _

_ If I’m not myself, I apologize. Really I just wanted to do something to help heal all the pain I caused. I know you’ll take care of me because you’ve always seen the best in me even when I didn’t deserve it, even before I had earned it. _

_ You don’t have to do this alone. Don’t shoulder all the responsibility, Hermione. Let those idiots we call our friends fill in the blanks, tell me stories, and try and convince me I like pineapple on pizza. I’ll be sending you help along the way. Don’t try and figure out when or how -I’m much too clever for that.  _

_ Just keep loving that clueless blond idiot in there. ( gods, I hope I’m not dead) _

_ Draco _

_ P.s I love you.  _


	3. In my life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We learn more about how they came to be. Theo and Pansy get letters too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the love and positive feedback! Each and every one makes my day !

_ Hogwarts  _

_ December 1998  _

He was falling. 

It felt like he'd been falling for ages. 

The night's sky grew exponentially in size as the ground rose up to meet him and the Astronomy tower loomed like a specter overhead. 

He wanted to scream so he would wake up but was too paralyzed to manage it.

The soft constriction of arms around his shoulders jolted him awake. 

The dorm lurched into existence, replacing the night sky. Hermione’s pounding heart and gentle touch encased his senses. Sometimes now, she didn’t even wake all the way up, just grabbed him and held him close on some newfound instinct. 

Being named Head Boy had been a move on McGonagall's part to keep a closer eye on him and give him extra menial tasks to keep him busy. Sharing a room with Granger was probably an extension of that. 

His first nightmare had occurred only the second night in. Even by his standards, it had been a terrible one, where he had sat up screaming. Granger had been at the foot of his bed, wand aloft, staring at him open-mouthed. She was posed in a defensive position as if deciding what spell to throw at him and then-

She launched herself at him, wrapping him in her arms fiercely as if to squeeze his demons from him.

They were only a “them” within the walls of the dorm, however. The outside world was still much too skeptical of anything that threatened to make waves, and neither one wanted to make their fledgling relationship a spectacle for the paper. 

It didn’t matter. At the end of the day, this is where he belonged; the rest was just details to work out later. 

A cold foot on the back of his thigh lurched him from his reverie. 

“Sorry. It’s cold, and you’re so warm,” she mumbled still sleepily. 

“Then cast a warming charm.”

“Hm. Not the same.”

Draco shifted them so he could see the rest of the room but still hold her close.

“ I think I’m going to go home for the holidays.” she didn’t glance up as she spoke but didn’t move away either. “Try again with them.”

“Good. That’s good. Maybe the time apart would -”

“They were gone for a year, Draco-”

“They weren’t your parents then. They were the Wilkins, not the Grangers. Probably just needed time to get their heads around it all.” 

She sniffed but didn’t say anything else about it. “Are you staying here or…”

He shook his head. “Going home. Trying to get back to normal...or what’s left of normal.”

“Do you think they’d even believe you if you told them? About this?”

“I can hardly believe it myself. I get to wake up in your fantastic tits- “ 

She swatted his shoulder but laughed all the same. It didn’t matter what was waiting outside the bedroom walls. This was enough.

  
  


***

They hadn’t spoken in hours. 

After their friends left, Hermione had tried to talk Draco into a lazy type of day by turning on various TV programs and movies, patting the couch next to her, sweetly trying to coax him to her. 

At one point, she left a copy of  _ Seekers Monthly  _ and a bag of crisps on the coffee table and retreated to the bedroom to see if she could lure him unintentionally. 

It didn’t work. Instead, he stared at each picture hung on the wall intently as if each one held the answers he needed. Occasionally he asked a question but never any follow-up after her explanation. After night had fallen and she was nodding off with her head on her fist, the questions had started to repeat themselves as if she’d give a different answer now. 

“Truly, your parents do not have a problem with us. Your mother was just here before your accident. She has to get permission to leave the country again so soon but I expect her at the door at any moment.” 

“What about your parents?” 

“They’ve hated every life I’ve made since I restored their memories. They think I should leave the magical world behind entirely and just….suppress it…” his mouth twisted into a confused grimace, and he chuckled. “You made that face the first time I told you that.” Her arm slipped, and her elbow caught on the guitar resting against the arm of the couch. 

“What’s that about?” For the first time, Draco had turned his eyes away from the wall of pictures and sat down. 

“You picked this up about a year ago after we took a trip past  _ The Dakota.  _ It was in a pawn shop window, and you said it was a sign from John Lennon...so now you mostly play Beatles songs.” 

Draco picked up the acoustic guitar and draped it across his lap. “Was I any good?”

“You  _ are.”  _

He thumbed the top string and placed his fingers tentatively along the frets. After a few stray notes, something seemed to come to him.

_ There are places I’ll remember _

_ All my life, though some have changed.  _

_ Some forever not for… _

Sighing heavily, he stopped trying to pick out the riff. 

“Better...” Supplied Hermione, but he’d already put it back. 

“I want to go to bed now.” 

“Alright.“ it was her turn to sigh as he turned and stretched. She summoned her spare duvet and pillows from the closet when he made a noise.

“We’re married and don’t share a bed? We were even doing that in the dorm…”

“Oh, I just...you’ve been through a lot...space...I didn’t know…” 

“Come to bed, Granger. It’s been a long day.” he held out a hand and guided her back to their bedroom.

*** 

Their temporary bliss was interrupted by a pounding fist on the front door. 

“I am knocking as a warning for you lot to put on pants.” Announced the voice of Theo. “I will be opening the door, and I do not want to see pasty Malfoy arse ...Granger, feel free - ow Pans I’m kidding.”

Draco groaned and pulled a pillow over his face. “Did we give them our address on purpose?”

“No...they just...turned up one day.” Hermione swung her legs over the edge of the bed. “Stop Theo, the neighbors are still sleeping, like normal humans on a Sunday. “

When she wrenched the door open, both Theo and Pansy were holding up identical white letters. 

“By order of Lord Malfoy, the forgetful, I’m to take you out for a  _ witches  _ day,” Pansy grumbled, stepping in and beelining towards the closet.

“Does that mean we’re shopping or starting a coven in the woods?” Hermione asked through a laugh. 

“I’m not sure. We’ll decide after coffee. I’ll dress you for either. “

Theo was steering a still disheveled Draco in front of the pictures again. “ According to this letter from you, I am to remind you to not fuck up your marriage. And I quote,‘ I am a lucky sod to have Hermione. I do not deserve her; remind me of this constantly. ‘ “ Theo folded the letter and pointed to the picture on the wall. “ Who’s that?”

“Hermione...Theo, I don’t think this is what I meant -”

“ WRONG!” Theo whacked him against the nose with the letter, “That is Hermione...Fuck if I know middle names ….Granger...Malfoy...Whatever. That is Hermione, love of your life! The being of light that holds your dark and twisted soul! The witch who uh….does that with her tongue that makes you stupid for days afterward- “

“Merlin's saggy tits stop!” Draco yelled trying to grab the letter that was still swatting him in the face. Theo pressed on, his tirade hardly making sense at some points until Draco silenced him with his wand. 

Theo tried to grab it from him, and it turned into an all-out brawl. 

“Coven it is,” Hermione mumbled. 

***

“Can I see the letter?”

Pansy arched a perfect brow. “He’d said you’d ask, and I’m to tell you ,no, that’ll you’ll try to re-work the timing charm and get them all at once. So I agree. No.” She gestured that she wanted them to go the next block over. “ Enjoy the mystery Granger, he’ll get his memories back, and it’ll be over soon. Speaking of romance…” 

“What do you mean speaking of romance? He’s been in an accident, there's been a physical and mental toll on both of us. Romance has hardly been in the air. “ Hermione sniffed and looked up the rows of posh shops Pansy had steered them to. 

“No books here, Granger. I think what you two need is date night to  _ rekindle some old memories _ . And a date night requires a shiny new dress. Hermione opened her mouth to protest but Pansy cut her off sharply. “It’s on me, the less you argue the faster this will go.”

An hour later and a pile of fluffy, frilly things later, Hermione found herself in front of a three-part mirror, irritated at herself for tearing up again.

“I don’t know...seems frivolous…” 

The music playing overhead caught her ear -

_ Some have gone, and some remain. _

_ All these places have their moments _

_ With lovers and friends, I still can recall _

_ Some are dead, and some are living _

_ In my life, I loved them all.  _

“Fine, fine, I’ll get the silly thing.”

Pansy tugged at the hem behind her. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“No objections? Good! Because now you need new things to go under the dress.”


	4. Blackbird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hermione tries to uncover the memories with a date night...and other things...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm well aware that were taking a sharp detour away from the plot of the movie. I'm sorry? But there's still hints and references throughout! 
> 
> Much love to my Alphabetaenabler TalonWillow

The Granger household had never been filled with this kind of tension. Before the war, the three had a peaceful home where opposing ideas had been discussed and dissected. Parental authority had rarely ever been on the basis of "because I said so."

But now, as papers lay covering their kitchen table; newspaper clippings, pictures, old school notes, the senior Grangers had decided to lay down the law with their adult daughter. It was not going well. 

Whoever had left the envelope on the doorstep this morning was no friend to Hermione. They hadn’t bothered to include anything of Draco’s acquittal of all charges being a minor at the time of being forced to take the Mark ;only everything leading up the end of the war. Then a recent section featuring the pair of them holding hands in Diagon Alley. 

“ _ Jesus Christ.”  _ her father repeated for the third time that hour. “Whatever happened while we were away...it made you not well, Hermione.”

“You don’t understand, and I don’t know how else to explain it to you. He’s changed; his whole family has changed. Draco’s grown up, and so have I. They don’t hold old prejudices anymore, not after...everything.”

Hermione’s mother rubbed her temples. “ So you’re telling me, there are still people who do. Just not them.”

“Unfortunately, yes, but that’s….anywhere in the world. People hate each other for all kinds of reasons all across humanity, I’m afraid. “ Hermione stuffed her owl post in the bag on her shoulder to open somewhere else. Half the bundle were howlers that would only add more fuel to the fire. 

“That’s just it, darling, your father and I think, maybe you ought to spend some time in our world. Go to Uni, travel, live abroad...something  _ normal _ now that you’ve finished your magical education, hm?” Her mother shuffled some papers nervously before finding the courage to look her daughter in the face.

“No. I don’t think I will. I don’t think I’ve fought for this long just to stop now. I have a lot I want to accomplish and a boyfriend I’d like to get to know better.” Hermione folded her arms across her chest, ready for the push back, hoping they would yell though they never had before. 

Her father just pinched at the bridge of his nose, pushing his glasses up his forehead. Her mother looked away and mumbled something like, “Well, you’re an adult now, I suppose -”

“I am, and I’d appreciate it if you trusted my judgment.“ Her throat felt too tight as she said, “I have to go; I’m meeting Draco for lunch. We can talk about this more tonight if you’d like.” 

She apparated away before they could answer. 

It was still pretty early for lunch on a Sunday, so the little cafe in muggle London wasn’t crowded at all, but Draco still picked a table hidden in a corner. Some of the tension ebbed as he stood when she approached. 

“I missed you,“ he mumbled before ducking in for a kiss.

“We saw each other yesterday.”    


“I know. Still, it was a long night without you.”

When he pulled away, Hermione could see the evidence of that written on his face. Dark circles ringed each eye, and something in the way he held himself seemed slightly less haughty than usual. 

“Couldn’t sleep?”

The server that came by dropped a whole pot of coffee on the table. Draco immediately poured himself some. “I made good use of the time anyway. I read that entire psychiatric journal you gave me, and I think I know what I need to do. The problem is actually figuring out proportions, as there’s nothing really close to it in circulation to work from.” He shrugged. “ And finding willing testers.” 

Her heart gave a little ache. “I’ll test it, of course.”

He gave her a little smile that eased the ache.“Thank you. Current regulations say I need a sample size of 25, though. So I need a recipe that doesn’t exist and 23 more people who will let me dose them with an experimental potion. Great. “

“We’ll figure it out. Once I start at the Ministry, I’ll start asking around.” Hermione looked at the small menu, determined not to meet his grey gaze.

“Still haven’t decided on a department?”

_ Damn him _

“No, which is a real shame because I’m really hoping to get my own place as soon as possible.

“Or...you could- “

“I’m not moving into the manor, and we aren’t getting a place together. We’re doing this right- “ 

Draco rolled his eyes. “We already lived together. “ 

“That’s no reason to rush into things. If this is meant to be, then...it’ll happen.” 

***

Hermione hoisted the strapless dress up again, noting her lack of prowess with sticking charms for fabric and noting to amend the situation at the first opportunity. A tinge of insecurity nudged at her. Her body wasn’t anything to be ashamed of, of course; it just wasn’t the same body as her late teenage self. There was just so much more to it. While pre-accident Draco showed his appreciation of it often, she wasn’t sure how this iteration of him would react.

If they made it that far. 

Of course, they would make it that far. It was a date with her husband. 

Draco’s morning with Theo only seemed to sour his mood. Outside the bathroom where she primped, the sound of him skulking around the apartment looking for something to wear was obvious. 

Right, well, this ought to cheer him up. 

She stepped out of the bathroom, and his eyes locked on her from across the room. 

“Your hair is up,” he noted, still staring. 

“I wear it up a lot now. " her eyes fell to her feet as she waited for a moment for him to say something else, and when nothing came, she walked to the closet to put her sole pair of heels on.

There was a white envelope sticking out of one. 

Nearly sobbing with relief, Hermione rushed toward it and ripped it open. 

_ Hi. _

_ If Theo and Pansy have done their job properly, I would think this is the next step.  _

_ You look amazing, no matter what you’re wearing, even if I don’t say it right away.  _

_ Once again, hopefully, I’m not dead, and I’m just an idiot. At this point, I’m probably just pissed at myself for fucking up in the first place. If I don’t have my memories back,it might be a matter of forcing them to resurface. Keep trying, Hermione. I don’t want to miss any more time with you. _

_ Always, _

_ Draco _

_ Ps.  _

_ I love you.  _

Clutching the letter to her chest, Hermione let herself sit on the floor of the closet and cry for just a moment. Then she stood up, put her heels on, and marched over to where Draco was leaning against the bed, the leather jacket hung on the bedpost beside him. 

“Put this on.“ She demanded, holding up the jacket to his face. 

“No.”

“Do it, or I’ll put it on for you, and you won’t like it my way.” 

“It doesn’t go- “

“You’re wearing all black, and this is black. It’ll be fine. Do it before I get my wand from my bag.”

With a familiar sneer, he slipped the coat over his shoulders. “Happy?” Hermione did the zipper up halfway and ran her hands over it to smooth it out. 

“Handsy, aren’t we?” 

She sniffed. “You’re my husband, and I’m still very attracted to you when you aren’t being a prat. Time hasn’t changed that.” She turned and grabbed her coat. ”I was going to have us take a cab, but I think we need to walk instead.”

He studied the seemingly shallow pocket of his jacket, slid his wand inside, and watched it fit comfortably. “I am a genius, aren’t I?”

“That was me, ” Hermione said without turning around. 

They walked for a few minutes without speaking, only keeping their heads down against the bitter November wind cutting through the city. 

"Why don't we use the Underground...er ..Subway?" he asked, still not looking at her. 

"I'm afraid neither of us like the feeling of being trapped, even after all this time. The apparition points aren't that far; we just didn't happen to get a place near one." She huffed from trying to keep up with his strides in heels. “Besides, we like walking. Just trust me.” Then in a bold move, she grabbed his hand and laced their fingers together. “ As soon as she did so, a tourist looking at a map ran into their linked hands, then had the gall to swear at them. “We do. I promise.” 

Dinner was a terse affair. Draco only seemed to be in the mood to sulk and complain about everything. Though they had been to this restaurant a number of times, nothing sparked, and it only seemed to sour his mood even more. 

“Right. After this, we’re taking a car to a spot where we had one of our best New York dates. I’m not going to tell you where, I want to see if maybe it’ll come up on your own.” 

“I’m tired.” He complained. 

“So am I.” She snapped. “But, this is all  _ your  _ idea anyway.”

“What?”

She shook her head. “The letters. Please just trust me. I know that’s hard, but before your accident, you trusted me for years.” 

“This is different than being at ...school.” He hissed, eyeing the muggle restaurant. “I don’t know this city as you do, and I have no idea what’s actually transpired between us over time.”

She retook his hand, this time gripping it with all her force. “At school, would I have ever hurt you? All those nights...I can’t believe you think I’d harm you.” She felt the tingle of Legilimency creep into her psyche. “Don’t do that. Listen to your own mind, find your own heart.” 

Brown eyes bore into grey for a long moment until he looked away, down to his lap. 

“I’m sorry. You’re right.”

“Now that is new. I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say that.“ She rewarded him with a small smile. 

The ice skating rink was blessedly less packed than normal.The spot that typically held the giant Christmas tree was still empty, but little else had changed. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever been ice skating…“ he muttered, watching the people glide around the rink.

“You hadn’t. You thought the whole concept was ridiculous until I said, ‘Well, it’s probably because you couldn’t do it,’ and thus, we found ourselves trying to ice skate the first time.” She had kept a firm grip on his hand the whole time but now moved to lean her head on his arm. 

“I bet I’m amazing.” Something in the retelling was making him smile for the first time. 

“You are decent. Most importantly, you can stop yourself. Which I still haven’t mastered.”

He laughed for the first time since the accident. 

*** 

Draco laid back on their pillows, arms folded behind his head, watching her with darkening eyes. He was already stripped down to his pants, waiting for her to undress. 

“I haven’t fought this long just to give up now.” 

Hermione stepped out of her shoes and reached behind her to pull the dress’s zipper and let the garment pool at her feet. Pansy had seen to it that her bra and knickers were delicate, pretty things she would have never bought otherwise.

Draco didn’t say anything. Instead, he’d frozen, eyes widening to take her all in.

With a tug, she let her curtain of curls fall over her shoulders, shaking them out. 

“ _ Gods.”  _ he breathed in disbelief. 

“What?” she undid the bra and let it fall to the floor. Draco sucked in a sharp breath.

“I knew you were beautiful. I knew that from my memory. But somehow I didn’t think you could get more so…” His eyes never left as she climbed up onto the bed and kissed him, slowly and full of intent. His hands skated over her body almost tentatively. “This feels more familiar than anything else has. Show me how to love you again.”

Later that night they laid there, over warm, glowing, and sated in each other's arms, listening to the sounds of the city outside. His voice was muffled by her hair where he had buried his face. 

“I keep hearing a song in my head.”

“Which one?”

“ _ Blackbird singing in the dead of night.  _

_ Take these wings and learn to fly. _

_ All your life _

_ You were only waiting for this moment to arise.” _

Hermione smiled. “You had that stuck in your head after our first ice skating date too.“ 


	5. Hey Jude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry and Ginny get their turn to help, and it all goes wrong

_ August 1999 _

“Are you going to tell me what happened, or am I just going to have to hear it from Harry?” Hermione peered between the bars into the holding cell, to the face leaning so casually against the wall, so inebriated he could only open one eye. He hummed the refrain of “Hey Jude” repeatedly, and the other drunkards were picking it up.

“Depends on what Potter says happened. I took on 3 to 1 before they went and got their mates. Wasn’t a fair fight, but I won anyway.” 

“You should have had your mother come get you because I’m about to leave you in there for the night. Let you sober up the muggle way.” Hermione pulled her arms around her tighter. “ Draco, the  _ Prophet _ is going to have a field day with this. You can’t keep this up.”

He scoffed. “I can’t even go outside my  _ fucking _ house without the Prophet sticking their noses up my arse Granger. My house that you won’t even live in with me.”

“This is not the time or place for that discussion. We are talking about you getting in yet another fight and ending up here. You made a copy of the Auror night schedule because Harry won’t put you in front of a judge because he knows what’ll happen.“ Hermione stomped her foot, feeling like a petulant child, but it was the only thing she could do at the moment. Hot tears welled up at the corner of her eyes. 

“Don’t cry. I hate it when you cry.”

“Then stop doing  _ this.” _

Draco sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, closing both eyes. “Those guys were talking about you. They said some disgusting things...and called you a... _ you know what. _ They wanted to hurt you...or worse. So no, I don’t think I will stop punching fuckers who deserve it.“ Hermione let out a little gasp, but Draco held up an unsteady hand. “I already told Potter, it’s being investigated.” 

Hermione felt her legs wobble dangerously beneath her. Summoning a chair from the other side of the room, she pulled it up to the bars and sunk into it. A million thoughts raced through her mind as her chest tightened with anxiety. 

“It’s never going to get any better, is it? This is how the rest of our lives will be. Fighting off the paper, the old prejudices…”

“And the new ones,” Draco mumbled, rubbing his left arm subconsciously. 

“And the new ones.“ She agreed. 

A few moments of quiet passed with only the sounds of Auror’s shuffling around the office and others in holding cells mumbling to their other visitors. A few of the cells kept humming,’Hey Jude while laughing. Hermione looked up when she felt a hand on the back of the chair. 

“I have an idea, but it’s mad.“ The voice of Harry Potter cut through the stillness. “And it means letting my best friend go too far away, but if it’s for her safety, I suppose that’s for the best.” 

“What are you talking about? ” Hermione turned in the seat to face him more fully. His green eyes held that glint that meant there was something he’d been keeping secret. 

“There was a bloke from MACUSA shadowing our departments. Asked me if I’d have any names of anyone who’d like to fill their new Creature and Beasts rights department, and I said I’d think about it. They cover the cost of relocation, help you find a place to live, all that.”

“Harry -” Hermione got to her feet and wrapped her arms around him in a hug. “You don’t have to -”

“I know I don’t. But I do know what it’s like; it feels like the war is never-ending. I’ve thought about leaving too, you know. Just do me a favor and take him with you.“ He nodded to Draco, who had drifted off to sleep. “ I’ll give the guy your name when I see him tomorrow.” 

***

Late morning sunlight flooded in but had yet to chase away the chill of the night. Hermione tried to slip out of Draco’s grasp but was only met with a strong arm wrapping her tighter around the middle.

“Don’t tell me you have to go to work.”

“No, I don’t. I’m still called out from your accident.” she resigned herself to being trapped. “You really should be resting more.” 

“I’ll rest when I’m dead - “

“Oh, don’t say that. You don’t get to say that anymore. I thought I lost you. Leave my knickers alone and listen to me.” She turned herself, still caged in arms. “ I don’t care if you ever get your memories back. I don’t care if I have to drag your miserable arse around this city for all time; I will do it. I love you too much.” Her fingers trailed along his jaw, feeling the stubble, watching him study her carefully. 

“I love you too.”

A portion of the anxiety that wrenched tight in her chest over the last week loosened, making it a little easier to breathe. 

“That’s the first time you’ve said that since the accident. I was so scared that - “ he cut her off with a kiss that stole the rest of her words. Her hands trembled as she wrapped around him, turning them so his body covered hers. It felt like finally coming home after being away for so long as their bodies slotted together, and with one hand, he pulled the sheets over them. 

There was a crashing knock at the door.“NYAD OPEN UP!”

Draco shot up in panic while Hermione laughed against him. “Harry thinks he does a good American accent when he does that. I tell him every time that it’s atrocious, but that doesn’t stop him.” She went to slide out from under the covers, but Draco stopped her. 

“Just ignore them. Stay here with me. We’ll see them later...or tomorrow...next week…”

Ginny’s voice carried into the apartment. “We’re here on your orders. Malfoy, don’t pretend you can’t hear us. And let the poor witch go. Knowing you two, I’m sure she’s dehydrated and sore- “

“Ew Gin, was that really necessary?” 

“Completely. But I now permit you to do the ‘cop knock’ until they answer.” 

Draco groaned and let go of the covers. “We need to move again. How does California sound?”

Wrapped in her dressing gown, Hermione let Harry and Ginny into the apartment. They immediately set to the tasks, white letters in hand. 

“I’m coming in!” Harry announced before unceremoniously throwing open the bedroom door, much to Draco’s protests. Ginny motioned for Hermione to sit and set down a large takeaway coffee cup. 

“Your job is to drink that while I feed you. Then you’re going to unload all those thoughts and feelings you’ve bottled up on to me. Because he’s right -” She tapped the paper still in her hand. “You aren’t in this alone, and you shouldn’t try to do it all yourself. You’re going through something traumatic too.” 

A pair of trainers went sailing into the living room from the bedroom, followed by Draco being shoved bodily from the room. 

“I don’t run, and I certainly wouldn’t with you, Potter!”

Harry slammed the door behind him. “You do, and we’re going. We run and mildly insult each other along the way. Keeps us motivated. Now put on the trainers before I have Hermione do it for you. You won’t like the way she does it.” 

“I don’t think I’ve lost my memory. I think I had some kind of mishap with a time turner and ended up in some bizarre alternate timeline where Harry Potter thinks we are friends.” Draco grumbled, picking up the shoes.

"I've theorized that several times. Or the possibility I'm in some bizarre magical coma. Either way, must stay fit." Harry mused.

Once the squabbling wizards had vacated the premises, Ginny slid a plate of breakfast in front of Hermione, then began to eat with the gusto of someone who fought siblings for meals growing up. 

"Spill." She commanded. 

"Well, we uh, reconnected last night," Hermione confessed. Ginny's ginger brows shot up to her hairline. 

"I wasn't aware  _ connecting _ was a problem?" 

"No, it came back to him pretty naturally. " she felt her face flush. "But the rest of the night was pretty touch and go. He's angry and highly suspicious of everything. Nothing I say or do seems to change it.”

“Insecure,” Ginny said through a mouthful of food. “Think about it, Hermione, you got married, moved practically the next day to a city you’d hardly known, and built a life. An honest to goodness life, weren’t you talking about kids? But now Malfoy’s still probably trying to wrap his head around how he landed you in the first place and if he can even keep up with you being  _ years  _ ahead of him. Hurts my head trying to get around it; I can imagine Malfoy probably just wants to sprint to the Portkey office.” 

Hermione pushed her food around her plate, too busy thinking to eat properly. “You and Harry haven’t been here that long, and you seem to be adjusting well.” 

“Harry was so sick of being ‘high profile’ and chained to a desk all the time, anywhere would have been an improvement. I came along because I didn’t want to spend any more time apart. The difference is I can remember how we got here; Malfoy can’t. To him, he’s just finished school and is about to get the first taste of freedom he’s had in his entire life; and boom, here he is.“ 

“So, what do I do next, Ginny? Do I just keep waiting for him to remember? What if he decides it’s too much and leaves?” 

Ginny seemed to think carefully about her answer before saying it. She looked around the apartment, at the cramped spaces filled with evidence of an established home, some things worse or better for it. 

“Start from the beginning. Talk about what made you move in the first place when he gets back tonight instead of just hoping he suddenly gets comfortable with it .” she finally responded sagely. 

Hermione thought about it for a minute, her memory in full tilt for pieces of physical evidence they still had from their life before. 

“I have an idea, but it’s mad.” 

Ginny and Hermione schemed over Hermione’s newfound plan for hours before noticing Harry and Draco still hadn’t returned. Something nagged at Hermione’s instincts. Draco was still recovering from a significant accident; this was no time for him to be physically pushing himself.

Harry dragged himself through the front door, looking harried and defeated, almost 3 hours later, his shirt sticking to him with sweat and his glasses dirty and foggy. 

“Where’s Draco? Harry….where’s my husband…”

Harry licked his lips nervously, looked at Ginny then to Hermione. “ I lost him in Central Park.” 

The only sound was “Hey Jude “ coming from the stereo in the corner. 


	6. I will

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Well...what’s your excuse?” 
> 
> “I don’t have one. Not a good one anyway.” 
> 
> “Why did you leave?”
> 
> “Nervous.” It was simple and honest. “I took one look at myself and questioned what I was doing. If I was ready to be the man you needed me to be. We’re still so young.”
> 
> Hermione sat down on the bed, still rumpled from the night before.
> 
> “Where did you go?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one more chapter after thiiissss

"What do you mean you haven't seen Draco yet?" Hermione glared daggers at the unsuspecting wizards in the reflection of the mirror. The hotel room was lined with stacked boxes of their combined things. Hermione stood in front of the bathroom mirror, her hair being wrestled into submission by Pansy. 

Theo opened his mouth to say something, but Harry guided him in a big step backward before speaking. 

"I mean, only that we haven’t seen him around here, or the manor, or my house, or the Auror’s Department...but that doesn’t mean he’s disappeared entirely, right Potter? Pans?”

"Can't talk Theo, waging war against this...mane…" 

Harry stepped forward. “ I think what Nott means to say is that Malfoy must be caught up in some last-minute moving errands? Wedding errands? Something productive, and I’m sure he’ll be at the registration office at 11, as promised.” 

Hermione tore away from Pansy who must have gotten a flash of accidental magic because she jumped away as if shocked. 

“Tomorrow, I am supposed to report to MACUSA headquarters. With my marriage certificate and spouse, to register our wands and magical signatures, so we can move into our apartment, so I can start the bloody job on Monday.  _ How  _ do you suggest I do that  _ without actually getting married?  _ I can do a lot of magic Harry -” she was invading his space as he held his hands up, eyes wide with fear, “I am a brilliant witch, but I’ve yet to master the art of conjuring  _ Draco fucking Malfoy  _ from nothing!” She mostly yelled the last line, pressing the poor wizard into the wall. 

“Nott...a little backup -” 

They were answered with the sound of a door slamming shut. 

“Fucking Slytherins,” Harry grumbled. “How about I go check the Auror department one last time? Because I’m sure whatever is keeping Malfoy is really very serious. Of the utmost importance.” 

“He’d better hope you find him first, so you can warn him,” she whispered before stepping out of the way so Harry could run from the room. 

Hermione stomped back into the bathroom to look at her hair, wild with the uncontrolled magic swelling through it.

“So change of plans you’re wearing it down,” Pansy announced as if nothing had happened. 

Looking at the spot where Draco’s dress robes had been hanging just the other night, Hermione bit her lip nervously. He’d woken before her, got dressed, and left the room before she could finish waking up. At the time, she had assumed he’d be back momentarily and didn’t bother to ask where he was headed. 

“What if he’s changed his mind, Pansy? What if it's too much and he’s not coming back?”

Pansy met her eyes in the mirror. “Not everyone has the blind bravery all you Gryffindors seem to be born with. He probably has had some second thoughts, but he loves you, so he’ll turn up. “ Her lips turned down into a pout as she thought. “If not, I know a great hex for his favorite body part.”

Ginny appeared in the mirror. “ Teach it to me later. I have a surprise for you Hermione.”

“It is my fiance?”

“Afraid not.“ She held up a white dress next to her. “Elbow-length sleeves, as per your request, A-line because you insist on hiding that gorgeous backside, and even though it was black in my closet, it is now white for yours.”

“Ginny, you didn’t have to- “

She waved a hand. “I have Harry’s vault now. Call it a wedding gift if you must. I didn’t have time for anything else.” Ginny held it in front of Hermione so she could see the length. “Might be a touch short- “

“That’ll get Draco to come out from wherever he’s hiding,” Pansy mumbled.

“True,” whispered Ginny, tugging on the dress in a feeble attempt to give it more length. 

The hotel room door opened and closed again. 

“Speak of the booty, and he shall appear,” mumbled Ginny. “Come on, Parkinson, let's not witness this, come teach me the hex out in the hall.” 

Hermione heard Draco mutter a greeting to both witches, waited for the door to signal their leave, and counted to ten before surfacing from the bathroom. 

Standing at the window with his hands in his pockets, he turned to watch her with a guarded expression. The weak sunlight cast a grey shadow on his well-tailored black dress robes. Had she not been so blindingly angry, she might have said something flirty or at least smiled. Instead, rage boiled right beneath the surface, and she had to press her lips tighter together to keep from shouting until she calmed enough to resist the urge.

“Well...what’s your excuse?” 

“I don’t have one. Not a good one anyway.” 

“Why did you leave?”

“Nervous.” It was simple and honest. “I took one look at myself and questioned what I was doing. If I was ready to be the man you needed me to be. We’re still so young.”

Hermione sat down on the bed, still rumpled from the night before.

“Where did you go?”

“A lot of places. Back to the Manor, around the gardens there, then to Diagon Alley, down Knockturn hoping I could find an open pub, then to the muggle world, again looking for a pub. Couldn’t find one, so I just keep moving, trying to think of another place.” A hint of a smile graced his lips. “Of course, then I realized that I was wearing dress robes and was getting some funny looks. The point is, I couldn’t think of anywhere I wanted to be more than right here with you.”

“Making a mistake?” 

He rubbed his hand across his forehead, grinning sheepishly. “No, Granger. I know mistakes; trust me on that one, but this is probably the smartest choice I could make. Just a lot to live up to. But judging by that look on your face, I may have blown it already.”

“It’s just that, you can’t leave. It reminds me too much of when Ron left -”

Draco’s face darkened. “What do you mean Weasley left?”

“I didn’t tell you that. Probably for a good reason now that I’m thinking about it…”

Draco sat down beside her on the bed. “Was it during the…”

“Yeah, we were out...well, you know...and he got fed up and left for months. I never thought I’d see him or anyone else again.“ His arm wrapped around her shoulders though she could feel the tension radiating off of him. “But I know logically this isn’t the same even if it feels that way; things are different now.”

He buried his nose in her curls, fingers pressing in tight to her arm. “I won’t do it again. I won’t. I’ll plant my stubborn arse right where I stand and make you kick me out. You might hate me more afterward, though.” 

They sat like that for a moment, in what she saw as the calm before the storm. She hummed the song she knew her parents had first danced to.

_ And when at last I find you _

_ Your song will fill the air _

_ Sing it loud so I can hear you _

_ Make it easy to be near you _

_ For the things you do endear you to me _

_ You know I will _

“Granger?”

“Hmm?”

“As much as I love you and your off key wailing -“ she swatted him on the chest, “We have to get married in half an hour.”

“What?! Why didn’t you say something sooner…” 

***

"What do you mean you 'lost' him in Central Park?" Hermione asked, very slowly, now feeling ridiculous in her old wedding dress. Between her and Ginny, they hadn’t quite got the top to fit right, and she was sure it wasn't this short when she first wore it. It  _ was  _ at least knee-length. 

"You look nice- " 

" Harry!" 

“You had one job, Harry! One job! Walk the Malfoy and bring him home! Your letter was only like 2 sentences long and ended with, ‘ Don’t fuck it up!’’ Ginny yelled at her husband, who was only growing more alarmed.

“I didn’t do anything! We were on one of our usual paths, kind of out of the way, you know, and we started to pick up the pace- “

“Like you should with the story!” Hermione snarled. 

“I went left ,and he went right, and by the time I realized it, I went straight back, and he was gone! I went all over looking for him, he shouldn’t have gotten that far; he was slower than normal.” 

A few glass frames cracked from the pictures on the wall as Hermione balled up her fists, trying to contain it, willing herself not to scream at her best friend. Exhaling heavily through her nose, she responded. “Okay. I’ll go look for him.“

“I already got the Aurors on it. “

“Yes, because Draco just naturally trusts Aurors.” Hermione snapped sarcastically.

“Point is, you should stay here and wait for him and let us know if he comes back. “ Harry deflected her last comment. “I’m going to go home and get cleaned up, then go back to the office and see if anyone knows anything. I’ll let you know as soon as I can.”

Ginny asked if Hermione wanted her to stay, and Hermione responded with a shake of her head. The Potters said their goodbyes with reassurances that he’d be back soon. 

Hermione dragged her feet back into their bedroom, pulling the wedding dress over her head and staring at the spot where his dress robes hung. She’d hope the recreation of their wedding day might spark something within him, or at least calm the fears that this wasn’t all that it seemed. 

Once settled in a tee shirt and joggers, she curled up on the couch and pulled her novel into her lap. It became difficult to stay focused on the words and a battle to just not spill any more tears. 

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the leather jacket hanging on the footboard of the bed. Padding quietly across the floor, she slipped it on over her shoulders and let his scent envelope her. Returning to her vigil on the couch, she curled up and waited. 

_ Sing it loud so I can hear you _

_ Make it easy to be near. _

_ For the things you do endear you to me. _

_ You know I will. _


	7. Fairytale of New York

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco stood in the doorway, looking more tired than Hermione had ever seen him. His shirt clung to his body, and his hair was thoroughly disheveled from running his fingers through it so much. 
> 
> She didn’t care. Throwing her arms around him, she nearly toppled them both to the ground.
> 
> “You didn’t leave. You said you’d never leave.” She kissed him over and over, almost crushing him to her chest. 
> 
> Footsteps sounded coming up the stairs behind them. Harry rounded on them in his Auror’s uniform. 
> 
> “I’m technically on call tonight, but I need to tell -”
> 
> “Granger, why the hell do we live in New York?!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here she is! The epic conclusion I hope you all enjoy! You get the rom com ending, promise. 
> 
> Fairytale of New York is not a Beatles song but its feature in the movie and very dramione. 
> 
> A huge giant thank you to my Alphabetaenabler TalonWillow. Siriusly y'all she's amazing.

Draco was one of the last people standing on the platform at a Hogesmede station. All the lower years had been successfully boarded on. The noise of a hundred conversations died away, leaving only the revving steam engine of the scarlet train. He could see chestnut-colored curls and a deep purple book in a compartment by itself from his vantage point. 

He had to know, and it had to be today. Once they got to London, they would be whisked apart by different living arrangements ( at Hermione’s insistence) and finding work. She’d even mentioned traveling a few times but had disagreed with the thought of him funding it from his vault. 

She lowered the book, turned in her seat in his direction, and smiled. 

It was at that moment he knew he was fucked. He would follow that smile anywhere. 

Once settled in the train compartment, only the steady beating on the tracks below them disturbed the silence of a conversation that needed to be had. 

“I’m ready to go public with this if you are. If you aren’t, that’s fine; I understand your reasoning. If you need more time to think about it as well. I read in the  _ Prophet  _ just today - “

“Granger -”

“It was all absolute tripe again, of course, but the way they hounded on about the -”

“ _ Hermione.”  _

She froze for a moment in mild shock. “I didn’t mean to say that all out loud. Sorry.” 

“Don’t apologize; it needed to be said.” He took her hand in his and brushed a kiss on the back. “I’m ready to take this public too. I just want to tell my parents in person first. Then I don’t care who else knows.” 

“Will you tell them tonight? Or do you think it’ll be longer? I’m just trying to make plans for- “ 

“ _ Breathe.  _ Yes, I will tell them tonight. I don’t know how they’ll take it, but after all, we’ve been through.” he let out a shaky exhale. “I’m really hoping they’re open to the idea.”

That seemed to calm her racing thoughts. Wrapping her whole arm around his and leaning her head on his shoulder, she whispered. “I was hoping you’d say that. I know it’s frustrating taking things so slow now...but I just want to do this right.”

“Who’s to say what’s right? This is our relationship; the rest of the world can sod off for all I care. I just want to build a better life with you.” 

****

The sun had set, and the city lights illuminated the sky before anything else happened. Hermione watched the shapes move on the T.V., not fully processing what was happening. Not bothering to move, listening intently for any noises outside the apartment- only to be disappointed over and over again. 

There had been a few feeble attempts to send a Patronus to Harry before giving up. Every happy memory now seemed only to make the despair worse, every one tinged with an edge of an unwarranted sense of betrayal.

_ He said he’d never leave. _

_ But he doesn’t remember making that promise. _

_ He doesn't need to remember anything to know not to leave.  _

_ You’re going to feel awful if he’s just genuinely lost.  _

Sighing, she changed the channel a few times, not caring what she landed on, just needing something to do with her hands. After a moment, a black and white movie came up, and the muted colors and soft tones of the voices lulled her away from her thought as she drifted off to sleep.

She jerked awake from the banging on the front door. Temporarily forgetting why she was on the couch, she yelled, “ Draco! Theo’s here!” before it all came back to her. 

“Granger...open the fucking door, please.” 

Almost tripping over her own feet to get there, Hermione made a mad scramble for the door and threw it open. 

Draco stood in the doorway, looking more tired than Hermione had ever seen him. His shirt clung to his body, and his hair was thoroughly disheveled from running his fingers through it so much. 

She didn’t care. Throwing her arms around him, she nearly toppled them both to the ground.

“You didn’t leave. You said you’d never leave.” She kissed him over and over, almost crushing him to her chest. 

Footsteps sounded coming up the stairs behind them. Harry rounded on them in his Auror’s uniform. 

“I’m technically on call tonight, but I need to tell -”

“Granger, why the hell do we live in New York?!” 

*** 

Draco had found his way to the MACUSA headquarters in Woolworth's building. He just happened to remember the muggle name from the place his parents mentioned in passing. By the time they had gotten in contact with the Aurors and with Harry, Draco had nodded off from sheer exhaustion."

When he awoke, he didn’t remember anything that had happened over the last couple of days. It was as if he was back to the day he’d woken up in the hospital. 

Hermione showed him where his clothes were along with the shower. Once the water was running, she let herself fall into Harry’s arms and sobbed until the water stopped. 

“Thank you. I think I can take it from here.” she sniffed, cleaning the spot on his uniform with a wave of wandless magic.

“Anytime. You know what to do if you need anything.”

Draco came out of the shower and sat uneasily at the table, watching Hermione make tea for them. She tried, she tried to explain it all again but choked and stumbled on her words. After a few tries, he squeezed her hand from across the table. 

“I’m exhausted, and I see you are too. Can we just go to sleep, please? I’m assuming we still do that…”

“Yeah...we still do that.” 

It wasn’t till after they had drifted off that Draco started to twitch, trapped in a nightmare. Hermione gathered him in her arms and held him against her chest until he settled down. At least they could have this; they could still have these moments even when no one else understood what it meant to either of them. 

The dawn broke much too quickly for her liking. The prospect of starting over seemed overwhelming. This time there wouldn’t even be the letters for hope. 

Draco groaned and rubbed his forehead. “Don’t you dare go to work today. I think I’m getting sick?  _ Gods, _ did I go drinking with Theo again?”

Hermione bolted upright, rounding on him. “Say that again?!”

“Oof don’t yell. Did I go out with Theo? Tell Potter I’m sick. I’m not running today; he can go...save a kitten from a tree on his own or whatever.” He pulled the covers over his face and sighed with relief.

“How long have we been married -”

“Too fucking long -”

“Answer the question!”

He ripped the sheets off from his face. “5 years. Are you alright?”

“What’s the last thing you remember…please Draco, this is important.” 

“I was bottling my potion yesterday and then nothing. I assume I went out with Theo to celebrate, and that’s why I feel like I ran a marathon yesterday.”

This time it was happy tears streaming down her face. She kissed him, cradling his face in her hands, letting her hands roam everywhere, hardly believing it was real. A song bloomed in her heart, filling it with joy. 

_ I'll be coming home again to you, love. _

_ And till the day I do, love. _

_ P.S. I love you _

_ You, you, you. _

  
  


Epilogue: 

“ _ And the boys of the NYPD choir were singing Galway Bay. _

_ And the bells were ringing out for Christmas day.”  _ Draco fell back on the couch in a drunken yet happy stupor. 

“That’s enough, eggnog for you.” Hermione fell in beside him. “Theo and Pansy must have spiked it with a heavy hand.” 

“They did. But that made watching them ice skate even funnier. My father released my inheritance Hermione,we’re rich! Issa good Christmas.” He wrapped an arm around her as she leaned into him. “ Why are you so sad?”

“I’m not sad.”

“You didn’t ice skate or drink. Don’t think I didn’t notice.“ He wrapped a curl around his finger and let it go, watching it spring back into place. 

“I’m not sad. I’m tired.”

He fell quiet for a minute playing with the same curl as before. “Why are you tired, Hermione? Are you feeling  _ ill  _ by any chance?”

“Slightly, but not a concerning amount.”

“Say it. Say it, Hermione, or I won’t believe it.”

She just grinned at him, watching him get more flustered. 

“Draco, I think I’m pregnant.”

“I fucking knew it!” He shouted, bringing her for a soul-searing kiss. One that warmed her bones and filled her heart with happiness, like music floating through the air. 


End file.
